funny jokes.........

soukaina-oubella Wed Oct 22, 2008 5:09 am

jokes jokes jokes jokes

October 22, 2008

Have you heard the one about the...

If you really want to learn a language then it's important to be able to understand the jokes told in that language. This is especially useful in English because jokes form an important part of the English language.

Here you'll find a wide variety of jokes - read them and see if you understand them. If you like one, then try to learn it, and finally practise telling it to other people. Then come back for more!

There are jokes at the moment.

TEACHER : Why are you late?
WEBSTER : Because of the sign.
TEACHER : What sign
WEBSTER : The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."

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A : Just look at that young person with the short hair and blue jeans. Is it a boy or a girl?
B : It's a girl. She's my daughter.
A : Oh, I'm sorry, sir. I didn't know that you were her father.
B : I'm not. I'm her mother

TEACHER : Cindy, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
ahmed : You told me to do it without using tables!

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TEACHER : Jo, how do you spell "crocodile?"
JOHN : K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L"
TEACHER : No, that's wrong
JOHN : Maybe it's wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!

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A teacher asked a student to write 55.
Student asked: How?
Teacher: Write 5 and beside it another 5!
The student wrote 5 and stopped.
teacher: What are you waiting for?
student: I don't know which side to write the other 5!

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TEACHER : George, go to the map and find North America.
GEORGE : Here it is!
TEACHER : Correct. Now class, who discovered America ?
CLASS : George!

TEACHER: ahmed, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
ahmed : Me!

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TEACHER : asma, why do you always get so dirty?
asma : Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.

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TEACHER : Ellen, give me a sentence starting with "I."
ELLEN : I is...
TEACHER : No, Ellen..... Always say, "I am."
ELLEN : All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."

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TEACHER : "Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?"
asma : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time."

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Teacher: Why are you late?
Student: There was a man who lost a hundred dollar bill.
Teacher: That's nice. Were you helping him look for it?
Student: No. I was standing on it.

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The teacher to a student: Conjugate the verb "to walk" in simple present.
The student: I walk. You walk ....
The teacher intruptes him: Quicker please.
The student: I run. You run ...

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TEACHER : Desmond, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as brother's. Did you copy his?
asma : No, teacher, it's the same dog!

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TEACHER : What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
asma : A teacher.
Razz